Conflict is a natural part of having an intimate
relationship. As couples come back to each other after a fight, in a place of
love, with words of forgiveness, the relationship is often stronger for it. It
is at least more intimate. The bumpy road of conflict followed by repair is the
route to a deeper connection. Now we know our partner's hot buttons very well. And
hopefully he knows our tender spots, too. How many of you had make up sex after
a fight? I am sure many, I have done it many times but is that the right
thing to do or is just temporarily solution
getting horny , dive in and the problem is solved?
In any relationship, there
are good days and there are bad days. For instance, you might want to do
something that your partner is completely opposed to, or she might want to go
shopping for the apartment when all you want to do is stay at home and relax
with the game or a movie. This is part and parcel of being one half of a couple.
When you first got
together with your other half, you couldn't stop contacting each other. Whether
it was on the phone, via text messaging or using e-mail and other online
messenger systems, speaking to each other almost every hour. That’s made you
feel closer to that person and start building this safety net , trust and
desire. You think this person is the one. You think you will never fight, arguing
or in some cases insulting each other but people are different and relationship
is a full time job for the rest of your life. Now and again, however, your
differences might become more serious and can lead to a breakup.
But how can you tell if
your fights are "good fights," the kind that will eventually help you
grow closer, or "bad fights," the kind that chip away at your bond
and be the reason to break your love?
When you have your first
small fight what is the outcome? . The outcome of a fight may not be what we
bargained for, but two individuals sharing a life will have many opportunities
to compromise.
Can small fights lead to
serious relationship doubt and question our love to each other or can they be a
platform sample of what really important in a relationship is?
We always want to be right
even if we are not at the specific fight, argument or situation but we try to
make our point and to win the battle. I won’t lie or hide and say yes
i am totally that person that when an argument occurred i always try to
prove and stand by my opinion and make my point clear right or wrong but in a
relationship should not be in that extremely and it will be better if you
losing up especially when you are wrong and instead of trying to make a point
and be stubborn, should we just say “ this is my opinion and i
wanted you to know what i think about but yes i think you are right and i
appreciate your feedback”…easy isn’t and the conversation is closed and we
moved on.
We just have to remind
ourselves that it's not who wins the match that matters, it's how the game is
played. Reminding yourself that love can return is the best way to insure that
you have good fights.
Fights are easy to start but are they necessary when you love someone and how can we avoid them and meet the happy middle?
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